For the past few months of learning, considering, researching and finally deciding to officially take on the whole profressional photography gig, I feel like I have been attempting to do a balancing act without any equilibrium. I am LOVING the creative outlet...both the creativity in the photography and exercising my mind on the business side of things, learning like a sponge, and penciling appointments onto my calendar. I love the to do lists and the feeling of victory when something grand is completed to my satisfaction (website, business cards, logo, marketing materials, packaging...). But in finding this creative outlet, I have been missing the boat on good parenting. We have been eating chicken nuggets and cereal and hot dogs and peanut butter sandwiches and little caesar's pizza and spaghetti, if they are really lucky. We have not been to the library to check out books in over a month. My house...suffice it to say I have had to block out a full day for cleaning before we could have people over. Pretty much a whirlwind of craziness.
But, as it always does when I need it, inspiration has come in the most unexpected places. I am finding some balance...and remembering to put things in perspective and keep my priorities in line. I remember why flyLady is so awesome...and why I really REALLY need to stay on track with that! I remember how much energy and life comes into me when my house is clean...all the time. I remember how important it is to just spend quiet time doing nothing. I remember how happy I feel when I get Morgan to school on time...and when I am the first one there for pick-up so he doesn't have to wait a single second for me. I remember how much better my body feels when I cook a real dinner every night (ok...leftovers or cereal one night a week is still good). I remember how important it is to turn off the computers, put away the homework and the studying, and the website, and the forums, and facebook, and email and blogs and just snuggle up to my sweatheart and watch a great movie. I remember how much I need order and schedule and how it is only freeing to throw it all out the window for a day if it is there all the other days to get me back on track! I remember how easy folding laundry is when you do it one load at a time (and when it isn't winter!!!).
Yesterday, I decided to make a change. I wrote down the schedule, made a commitment to myself, talked to the kids about it and set some new rules. We worked together to get the house clean...really clean. I gave myself some "working hours" and figured out how to do what needs to be done on my terms. I think I need to do this about once a month...because I forget!
Today, I followed the schedule (mostly). We slept in...because today is the first day of in between semester break for Seth, got our garden patch ready for planting, put away the folded laundry, played games, read books, kept the kitchen clean, kept the house clean, did the work that needed to be done, and now Seth and I are sitting opposite each other typing away on our laptops...not by default, but because WE decided to put that in the schedule for tonight.
Motherhood is a balancing act...life is a balancing act.
And when there is balance, I feel more joy, I feel more peace, I feel more control, I feel more empowered, I feel more fulfilled, and I feel more productive.
I love this scripture today:
Organize yourselves; prepare every needful thing; and establish a house, even a house of prayer, a house of fasting, a house of faith, a house of learning, a house of glory, a house of order, a house of God.
